Okay no. Fucking no. You think your sandwich is cute with peanut butter and jelly hearts, fucker? Well you’ll change your mind once you put it together and try to eat it. First you’ll get a mouthful of just bread and disappointment, then when you take another bite your mouth will be assaulted by copious the amounts of sticky peanut butter and sugary jelly and there won’t be enough bread to save you from it. A sandwich like that is what failure tastes like. The pb and j may be shaped like hearts but there’s no love in that sandwich. It’s about balance. Life needs balance, and so does your fucking sandwich. You disgust me. Don’t talk to me until you know how to make a proper sandwich.
The proper pb and j:
Mix the peanut butter and jelly in a bowl together first. Find a consistency that you feel tastes the best, for me it’s about 3:2 where pb:j.
Why mix them you ask? So that there are no pockets of peanut butter, no pockets of jelly, and this mixture is so easily spread that there are no just bread bites.
Also, if there is leftover pb and j mixture, grab a spoon and you’ve got dessert.
Between The Buried And Me have released a new music video for “Lay Your Ghosts To Rest.” Watch the video below after the jump.